I got up just after 9 this morning, made a coffee while the better half made me fag and then had a glance at my Facebook news feed whereupon I spotted one of my friends had commented on a photo asking whether or not Scots would be voting for independence. "This should be worth a giggle or two" I thought to myself, so I check out the comments, my first mistake. I quickly realised that, as usual, you have the obligatory pubescent boys quoting one word from that absolute clusterfuck of a "historical" movie starring Mel Gibson, which is an American funded movie, with an Australian lead playing a Scottish hero. I can't be the only one who sees the irony in every nationalist having quoted this movie at some point, christ, even I did when I was younger and hadn't researched the true cost of Independence for Scotland and hatched a plan to drunkenly march into Berwick-Upon-Tweed with a clan of kilted and face painted friends to reclaim it for Scotland.
My second mistake came when I stupidly clicked the view previous comments button at which point I was affronted with one statement which drove me to turn the PC on and write this, and the statement read along the lines of "If you vote no to independence you're not Scottish"
Oh, you stupid stupid person, now you're open for a slating you will probably never ever see, but it will make me feel better to get it of my chest.
So according to this knuckle dragging nationalist, if I vote against the inevitable introduction of the Euro as our currency, and in favour of the money in my pocket (which is still one of the strongest currencies on the planet) I'm not Scottish? Wrong sir! Look back at Greece and a little forward to Spain, and ask them how the Euro has helped them then come back to me with your apology.
Now that I've started I'd like to bust a few myths, firstly, no matter how much shortbread or whiskey we produce, no matter how many tourists we can pull in, because lets face it, they are probably our three biggest money spinners in this country, we would have to face MANY generations of financial austerity before we could call ourselves a financially viable independent country.
Secondly, the "we have the UK's Oil!" argument.... if anyone thinks BP or whichever company it is that holds the drilling rights to the oil in the North Sea will be handing any money over to Scotland for oil drilled in International water, you are sorely mistaken. At the moment under the union we receive a subsidy for any oil lifted from the sea bed, which will stop if the SNP get their way, and all the money will go to Westminster, so that's that argument fucked right out the window, isn't it?
Third, the SNP themselves. Has everyone forgotten all the past trouble caused under the banner of Nationalism across the world? Lets start with the BNP shall we? A party that lives and breathes hatred for anyone who doesn't fit into their skewed view of what's British, do you not think they'd turn on us Scots the minute we sever ties with the Union? Maybe not the current generation, but the generations born after the referendum will be fair game in their eyes. My problem doesn't really lie with the BNP though, so much as it is with the leader of the SNP taking educational policies straight out of Mein Kampf! Alex Salmond recently announced a plan to change Scotland's History lessons to omit anything to do with the union and only teach Scottish history, which was last attempted 70 years ago by a Mr A. Hitler, and we all know how that ended up don't we?
Although after ranting about all this I've come to realize with Mr Salmond's previous track record, he will promise all of Scotland independence, then only take it as far as St. Andrews Square before giving up and expecting us all to forgive him and forget about it, but if he does succeed in his master (race?) plan I will be taking my family and moving them 15 miles down the road and over the border into England, where I'll still be proud to call myself Scottish because I'll still be smiling after losing at something :D
